Jury Duty...

Getting stuck in the elevator with a group of people is one of my biggest fears. I'm not super claustrophobic but the fear always creeps into my mind when I get into an elevator with other people.

This week I performed my civic duty as a jury member. I'll admit that serving on a jury of my peers, addresses some of the same fears I have about getting stuck in an elevator.

Boring predicament with lots of waiting.
Nothing to talk about.
No end in sight.
Fear about what is going to happen next. And afterward.
Thinking about all the things I should be doing.
Phone restrictions.
Annoying personalities.
Bad breath.

All of these things could be associated with both jury service and getting trapped in an elevator full of people. Or like being on Lost. Or any situation where you are stuck with a bunch of strangers and you have to make decisions and worry about the unknown.

I think in any situation where you have to work with a group of strangers, a certain chain of events takes place. First, if you are like me, you try to recognize the people in the group, even if you don't know their names you create a sort of pheumonic device for their faces.

Serving as a juror this week, I found myself attempting to make a connection with each of the jurors by figuring out who they looked like in my family, on t.v. or in my circle of aquaintances.

One man looked just like my friend Brannon, so as juror number 7, he was automatically 'Brannon #7' (and obviously the person I would most likely turn to in case of a zombie invasion if we were under attack during our stint at the courthouse.)

On woman was 76-years-old with gray hair, ice blue eyes and two moles on her face. She looked a little like my mom, mixed with a yeti, so she was 'my abominable mom'. Seriously, it was weird.

Another woman had red hair and mannerisms that reminded me of my aunt Sharon, so she was 'aunt sharon' and a there was another who reminded me of a teacher at school because of the way she would make her points and blink while looking at me, I felt like we were on the same team.

None of these characteristics were a personality flaw, just my way of feeling like I belonged the group...I had a few family members, a friend and even a co-worker. It made me feel much more at ease with the situation.

And serving on a jury is a serious situation.

The second thing you try to do if you are in a group of people, after finding at least one 'familiar' face, is try to make small talk to determine who your allies are and who is just down right annoying. We were all dying to talk about the trial, but we weren't allowed to discuss anything until the deliberation process.

So, we talked about the weather, dinner, how cold it was in the courthouse...we tried to find anything we could to make conversation.

At this point, it was clear that I was going to get along with everyone just fine. All of the jurors were friendly, and no one had a loud-opinionated demeanor.

In a crowded elevator, I think I could have gotten along with this group just fine. Thank god.

Third, after you all get over your nerves and the ice has been broken, you try to find issues with which you can agree on within the group. I tried to stay away from this...I took a book...and I just tried not to form a strong opinion about anyone or anything going on around me. My job was to be open-minded and listen to all the facts. I think it made thins easier.

Fourth, bonding ensues.  The end is in sight and you know you have done what was expected of you...now its just a matter of taking care of the final business.

In this case....we all got along so we started to make jokes. Half-heartedly about people or events related to the case. We had all bonded over our experience together and we were able to laugh about the bikers outside the courthouse...we worried, jokingly, that the gang was probably waiting to watch us come out so they could get revenge. We knew we were safe, but we couldn't help but see the humor in something, after such a serious day.

So if you ever have to serve on a jury...don't be too scared...the entire process is pretty interesting. It is our civic duty, as members of a democracy to make a contribution to justice. It is a lot like what you see on t.v., but its different when you are part of the show. When you have to make a responsible decision...it is very serious and it does weigh on your heart.

I do have a few suggestions of things you might want to consider if you are ever called to serve:
1. Take a jacket or sweater
2. Take a book, it gets boring on the recesses
3. Take some mints and/or gum
4. Take change for the vending machines
5. Don't wear perfume because people are sensitive
6. People stink....so have a mint ready to help mask their odor. Seriously.
7. Be prepared to sit. And wait. In uncomfortable chairs.
8. Be prepared to have an open mind.
9. Have your listening ears on.
10. Have a good attitude. Be humble and grateful for the judicial system. We live in a free society and the person on trial deserves a group of peers that will respect his innocence until proven guilty.

It was an honor to serve on this jury...I would definitely do it again, without dread.

Now I am behind at work, but that is okay.

What I did was important.

And I learned a lot about myself and working with a group of people.

Luckily, I didn't get trapped in an elevator with a bunch of rude, opinionated stinky people...my group was pretty decent and we were able to reach a decision. I feel good about the experience.

 

The photos in this post are from my Holga camera. Thanks for reading!

Universal Truths

I am generally just annoyed by about 80% of the forwards I have gotten over the years....I do not believe any wishes will come true if I do not forward on the chain mail so I rarely share those forwards with other people.

Every now and then, a funny forward finds its way into my inbox. Earlier this week, I received one that  I just had to share.

I could've written most of these...In fact, I wish I HAD written them! I may have to write my own list! I laughed out loud on some of them, they are universally funny and totally true! Enjoy!

UNIVERSAL TRUTHS:


1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

2. Nothing stinks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

5. How in the world are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

6. Was learning cursive really necessary?

7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

10. Bad decisions make good stories.

11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.

13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page  research paper that I know for sure I did not make any changes to.

14. "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this - ever.

15. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Hello?), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What did you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?

16. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste!

17. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

18. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.

19. Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on when I first saw it.

20. I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

21. The only time I look forward to a red light is when I'm trying to finish a text.

22. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

23. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?

24. Shirts get dirty. Underwear get dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.

25. There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.

26. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

27. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet my behind everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time!

#28 (this one is mine!) Every time I see one of those mini tents or mini trampolines at a sporting goods store, I wish I could get out some barbies and play!!

A funny story about a flying hippo and some dog tags....

Okay so a while back I posted something about hippos and kids. I alluded to a student's drawing at my school of a flying hippo....well, here it is...In all its 'flesh' colored glory. (I couldn't get a great picture of it...so this will hopefully satisfy)


I do have some really great artists at my school. We are currently working on a drawing unit. I am having them draw vintage cameras...the goals is to create an image bank...a journal full of drawings that they can use to create paintings and other artwork from and it is also intended to teach them how to draw. I am forcing them to draw for a long period of time...and it helps them learn how to see things.

we are also using viewfinders....sort of cropping the image so that it isn't all in the frame....not bad for 3rd/4th grade students!

I also wanted to share a blog from my old MySpace blog...it is a pretty funny one from back in April 2008.

Gum, black hole and dog tags......

One day a few months ago one of my students had on a necklace. It was one of those key chain dog tags and it had been personalized with his name and football number on it. It was very shiny and new. I told him it was very cool. After that, he just HAD to give it to me. I knew his mom would probably be wondering where it was eventually, so I put it somewhere safe so that when he came to me later I would be able to give it back to him. My safe spot just happened to be a special zipper pouch that I tuck into my purse where I carry my lipstick.

Today my student came to me during class wondering where ’my’ necklace was that he gave me...I told him that it was safe, in my purse. Of course, being an inquisitive 10 year-old, he wanted to see it...to make sure that it was safe. I went to my purse and unzipped the lipstick pouch...but the necklace was missing. I knew that I hadn’t taken it out of my purse so I began searching for it. I looked in the side zipper part. No, it wasn’t there either. So I started to remove a few of the bigger things, my wallet, my address book, a bottle of lotion, my checkbook, some ink pens, my gianormous set of keys, a granola bar.....

Finally, I spotted the shiny silver dog tag at the bottom of my purse....That’s right...it was buried beneath the bottomless pit of bobby pins, paper clips, buttons, earrings, pennys, rocks, scraps of paper, gum wrappers, tiny chunks of trident that have wriggled free from the wrapper, rubber bands, reciepts ...there it was....luckily I had found his necklace...but....when I rescued it from the rubble I realized that it had been slimed with some of that yucky spearmint gum...chunks of the gum had somehow goo-ed up the chain and his once-shiny namesake was now minty fresh with rubbed on gum residue. He saw the gum immediately.

He looked up at me. ’What did you do to my necklace?’ All I could do was laugh. ’I am sorry’ ’your necklace got gummed’ was all I could giggle. I went straight to the sink and got some soap as he watched me frantically trying to clean off his precious un-shiny dog tag key chain. Other students started to gather around at this point and I tried to explain that I didn’t realize it had slipped from the safe spot into the bog of junk in the bottom of my purse. I scrubbed and scrubbed, but the gum was stuck...Lime green gum.....I vowed to take it home and use some special gum remover to clean it off. "My mom’s purse wouldn’t have had yucky gum in the bottom of it" he said...."I know, but this kind of thing happens to me, I’m so sorry" I laughed, embarrassed.....

Um, yeah...my purse is not going to be a safe spot for children’s treasures ever again!!

A real case of the brown boob.

Today I woke up feeling like it was going to be a great day. A little rainy, somewhat dreary....but otherwise, wonderful. I was excited to go to school. I have a student teacher and she is gone on Thursdays so today I was finally going to get to teach. (I am really enthusiastic about my 'Where the Wild Things Are' unit this week!)


Unfortunately, I checked my email around 6:45 and got some unpleasant news. One person emailed me with information that made me a little frustrated because they aren't going to follow through on something. Another email informed me that I have to do something that I really don't want to do. So, my enthusiasm melted into frustrated and anger at two completely unrelated events. I don't like to start my days like this. It causes distractions.

As I was leaving, I realized two things. First, I was wearing a white and gray striped shirt...and an OFF-White vest-jacket-thingy. not cool. I must've dressed in the dark. (The vest is perfect for pretending to be Max from 'Where the Wild Things Are'...it has a hood and fur!) Anyway, it was too late to go back, and I knew that I didn't have to wear the vest once I got to school.

Second, I forgot my mug of hot tea on the end table at home. Still not going all the way back. I was right on time and I didn't want to be late.

As approached the school, I got an intense craving for a giant Coca-Cola...yep, 7:15 and I just had to HAVE some sugary caffeine or else I wouldn't make it through the day. I stopped at the little cafe a block from school and grabbed a medium coke. When I got to school, the slight drizzle had turned into a steady downpour. With great anticipation, I reached around behind my seat and felt for the umbrella...SCORE! Yay! I loaded up my arms with my camera bag, lunch box, purse/school bag, coke and umbrella...and my keys.....I somehow managed to juggle everything, in the dark, and unlocked the door.

I made my way down the hallway to my classroom trying to keep the wet umbrella from soaking me and trying to close it while holding my keys, styrofoam coke cup. When I reached my door, the umbrella crushed the edge of my coke creating a large gash. Dramatically, I yelled "NO!" and literally dropped everything else, ran into my classroom, grabbed a paper towel and took off running down the hall towards the teachers lounge for a new cup. The secretary must've heard me yell and she came to see if I needed help. "Must save my coke" I shouted back at her as I grabbed a new cup and put it around my bleeding drink. I saved most of it. Whew.

After breakfast duty, I went back to my classroom and took a big drink of the coke. I must've titled the cup a little bit and it spilled all over my white and gray boob. Thats right, a real case of the brown boob. What a day. Luckily, my apron seemed to cover most of it.

Okay, but I haven't even told you the really exciting part of the day yet.

Sitting in the workroom, eating my lunch with the other teachers, suddenly the fire alarm starts to go off. Seriously. It is the middle of lunch for the Kindergarten and First Grade classes and it is pouring down rain outside. I join the k and 1st teachers and start sprinting down to the cafeteria. (My hooded vest is in the classroom, but I could've used it for what happened next!!)

We line all the students up and begin escorting them outside. We tried to crouch under a tree but it was raining very hard. The ground was soaked, the sidewalks and gutters were flooded and we were trying to sing songs like "R.E.D red, R.E.D. red, I can spell red...firetrucks are red, stop signs are red too, R.E.D". Some of the kids were scared, this was their first experience with the fire alarm and a couple of them were crying so the singing helped (somewhat) to calm them down.

Finally, the principal gave us the 'thumbs up' to go back inside {false alarm} and we helped the students find their spot at the lunch table so that they can finish eating.

Everyone was soaked and shivering. There was no time to grab an umbrella, all I could think about was making sure everyone was safe.

As for me, all I can say is "Drowned Rat".

Things were a little wild in the building after that. I am sure every teacher has a story about something crazy that happened AFTER the fire alarm. I must say, both classes I had after lunch were pretty much uneventful.

After school, a former student was wandering the building showing everyone something spectacular. The planets are aligned. Brooms can stand up.



Today, the gravitational force on the earth will let a broom stand up. That explains everything. I can blame the cosmic universe for my brown boob. Gotta love that.

A bag lady.

Whew!!! I am seriously trying to carry around fewer things with me every day, but it is so hard. I have to have my computer and lunch bag every day. I don't normally take my purse into school but I do carry it in the house when I get home from school. I have a bag that holds my planner, phone and a few other things I might need during the day called my 'school bag'. I also have a bag for shoes/teacher survival kit. This contains extra shoes.

My feet are wimpy. It takes me so long to break them in when school starts. My legs and back ache. My feet get blisters. It doesn't matter what shoes I am wearing...I can even wear tennis shoes and my feet always hurt for the first few weeks. I also try to wear dresses (so that I can establish my 'art teacher' persona with the kids) and I am forced to wear dressy shoes that kill my feet so I always keep some flip flops with me in case I start to die in the middle of the day.

Also, in my teacher survial kit I have things like bobby pins, lotion, and mints. I travel throughout the week and I don't always have everything I need at one school so it is nice to have some things with me.

I don't go anywhere without my camera. Some days I even make two trips from my car to carry arm fulls of student art work, examples and supplies. Whew!! I am such a bag lady. If you have any tips on how to simplify...please let me know!

Thanks for stopping by!!

A case of the not-so-stolen Identity

So August 6th was full of ups and downs for me.

I spent the morning working at school to prepare for new year and then I ran home for a just a minute to drop off my computer so that it wouldn't get hot in the car. When I got home, I was walking into the house with my hands full of bags, computer, lunch leftovers, and out of the corner of my eye I noticed a huge black ribbon snake stretched out between the bushes looking up at me. (I have a history with big black snakes, I once found one stretched out across the doorway of the bathroom and I almost stepped over it...snakes give me the heebie geebies now.)

Upon seeing the snake with yellow stripes down his back, I immediately went into full freak out 'ohmyghosh there is an unexpected snake in my yard and I am super creeped out and my hands are full and I want to scream, but that is just dumb, but I am still freaking out ohmygosh' mode.

I wasn't sure what to do so I sent a text to my neighbor Kaanan and she sent Maynard over. Maynard walks into the yard talking on his blue tooth headset (on a work call) and he kills the snake with his shovel. It was a little gruesome but I felt like he saved the day, I was sort of a damsel in distress....

After an afternoon meeting, I went out with some friends for dinner. As I was finishing my sushi, I found a long, limp hair slithering across the surface of my plate. I couldn't take another bite.

When I got home from the dinner, I picked up a letter from the Department of Revenue. Hmmm. That is a little odd.

" On September 3rd 2009, your privilege to drive a motor vehicle in Missouri will be suspended for 30 days for an accumulation of traffic convictions. You are to surrender [your Missouri driver license}"

Haha...there must be some mistake. I have had 2 tickets in the last 3 years. One was for speeding in 2006 and the other was for running a red light in Duquesne. I paid them both. No big deal.

I open a second letter:

"We recently notified you that your privilege to operate a motor vehicle will be suspended for 30 days, beginning Sept. 3 2009. After your notice was sent, additional points were assessed on your record. The conviction changed your suspension TO A ONE-YEAR REVOCATION."

Conviction(s) we received and processed:
Speeding
Careless & Imprudent
Improper Lane
Speeding
No Driver license
Traffic/Turn signal viol
Traffic/Turn Signal Viol

"After you are reinstated you will have to pass the written and road tests for a new license....and you will have to file an SR-22 with your local insurance company to show proof of financial responsibility."

Okay. Not funny. Someone has obviously made some sort of clerical mistake OR someone has stolen my identity. After reading the first letter, I thought it was sort of funny, wow someone is in serious trouble...the second letter must be a correction letter....But the second letter was worse. I am a teacher, I can't have my license revoked. This is madness. I am just a normal girl, minding my own business, la la la, I saw a snake today, and then WHAM!

My 'worst-case survival handbook: identity left" started to kick in. If my records indicate that I don't have a license, I can't even drive to the DMV to get a copy of my driving record...if I get into a wreck or get stopped on the way, I will go straight to jail--do not pass go, do not collect two hundred dollars.

If someone has stolen my identity and points have been added to my record then this person when to court and plead guilty--pretending to be me.

A million fears started circling in my brain. Do I need to get a lawyer? What do I need to do first? Who would do this? I was awake until after 3:00 a.m. tossing and turning, worrying about how I will prove my innocence, going to court, fighting the state to clear my record.

This morning I made a phone call to some friends I have over at the highway patrol to report my possible identity theft. (Thankfully I used to work there and one of the troopers is now a detective and he happened to be in the room when I called). When they looked at my driving record only my 2 tickets showed up. The revocation wasn't in the computer. They suggested that I go down and talk to someone at D.O.R. So I head to the driver license office.

The woman at the counter told me exactly what they did and she printed a copy of my driving record. She told me to call Jefferson City and find out what was going on with these letters.

The state of Missouri has a very outdated system for storing driving records. The screen is an old black mainframe with green lettering. I asked the woman how these letters were generated....they were obviously from the same matrix, but now this info isn't in the computer? How is that even possible? She didn't know.

I called the D.O.R in Jefferson City. Carolyn answered after the second ring.
ME: "Hi Caroly, wow....I can't believe I got a human so quickly. I just had my driving record printed at the license office in Joplin and it reflects two tickets that I have received in the last 3 years. But I got a letter in the mail from your office stating that I have 7 tickets and my drivers license is being revoked for a year. There must be some sort of mistake."

CAROLYN:"What is your driver license number? And your name?..........Okay, yes, there was a mistake with your records but it was corrected on Wednesday so you can disregard the suspension notification."

ME: "Seriously, Carolyn...I thought my identity had been stolen, I am freaking out, I was going to get a lawyer......wow...um okay....can I get something in writing that says to disregard the first two letters?"

ME" "A letter will be mailed out on Monday."


So....I think killing that snake was a bad omen. Luckily nothing seriously bad happened. It was all a huge misunderstanding. I think MO-DOT punked me.